A Saint Martin Romance

“You’re my business now.”

That’s what he said, when I asked him why he wanted to know where I’d be and what I had going on for the day.

“It’s none of your business,” I told him, feeling mostly serious, but also, a little flirty too.

As a solo traveler, it was high key a protective measure, but in the spirit of honesty, I also really felt like it wasn’t his business. Having met him only 3 or 4 days earlier, he didn’t know me like that, but I also needed to assert my position, which was that I was mine to keep.

That’s just my steelo.

It’s worth noting that there was a hint of “smart ass” in my tone, but little did I know…he had something for my a**.

“You’re my business now!” He retorted with his chest from the other end of the line. “How about that?”

I was shook. lol

I had only been in Sint Maarten for one week of my dream, three-week, extended stay, when I met him, a man, who became my protector and my friend.

““You’re My Business Now””

That call was a turning point for me, because before that moment, the last man I could recall coming at me in this manner was my high school sweetheart, whom I had met on one random Friday evening. Within two weeks of knowing him, he came so hard that I blinked, and we were in a whole relationship…for years. hehe. He was Caribbean too. #justsayin

Anyway, looking back on it, I would refer to our time together in Sint Maarten/Saint Martin a pure, innocent love.

We dated, he showed me around, he practiced French avec moi(translation: with me), and he simply hugged me goodbye, whenever it was time for me to go home to my undisclosed apartment on the island.

Although I knew it wouldn’t progress, I was really on an island, experiencing a romance that did not require me to sacrifice my core values. Not my dignity, my confidence, my attitude, my money, my body, nathan.

Plus, he liked when I was a lil sassy, and he didn’t mind that I wouldn’t kiss him…well, he minded but it didn’t stop anything.

With that, although we never kissed or explored any physical intimacy whatsoever, we still shared many an intimate moment. We were intimate when we talked about our lives, when we shared things about each other and when we experienced each other’s raw emotions…like anger. lol

I can recall this one time, when he got mad at me, because I went to a restaurant and ordered toast.

“You went out to get TOAST?!” TOAST?!!!

He kept repeating it… lol

To his point, it was a little wasteful, because I really did pay like $15 for four pieces of toast, eggs and bacon, but it was COVID, and the economy was just better then. You could be a little wasteful…lol

Anyway, this man got so mad that he cooked dinner for me the same day.

I’m not gon’ front, this trip was when I really started to think about what I was willing to give up in life.

Like, America? A good job?

In my head, I could’ve lived off the land baby. lol

Anyway, the fact that he would do that for me felt so special.

To add, he did it without berating me for missing the basic survival skills to buy a pack of wheat bread and do it for myself(lmao). As a woman, who has a rebellious relationship with domestication and men, who think that’s how my womanhood is defined, it went a long way.

He was just about me.

Now, that’s what would make me want to get in the kitchen and domesticate myself(not slavery under the guise of femininity).

Back to intimacy with regard to emotions, there was also that one time he got mad at me. See the difference?

On this occasion, we had planned to go out together in Maho. Judging from the night, I guess his agenda was for us to pull up and walk in together.

Now, I’m very much like fun and games, but when it starts feeling serious before I’m ready, the answer is no, hell no and absolutely not. It was cool for us to date, but I was not down to go to the #1 party on the island and pull up taken. I know the game when I see it, and I didn’t want nobody thinking anything lol.

Anyway, he got mad and gave me a few words(literally a few), but here’s what I remember.

“Tu es bete,” he said before repeating it softly with an heir of frustration.

This was a serious conversation, but I was laughing internally, because no this man did not just call me dumb in French.

I understood immediately, and I responded, “Tu es bete, aussi,” which translates to “you are dumb too.”

…I was in my 20s, and that wasn’t the right response, but we’re here now. lol

As you may have guessed, we never made it to that party, but that wouldn’t keep him from seeing me again, because he meant what he said.

I was his business.

During the rest of my time, he would call to check on me, take me around the island, and create with me some of my fondest memories.

Furthermore, if I needed something or if I was ever in a position where I felt I was in trouble, I knew I could call him and he would come to me.

Stories like this one make me grateful for my life abroad, my dating journey and the path that has been especially carved for me.

In moments where I feel slighted, lonely, and sometimes forgotten, I can look back and point to periods of my life where “love” manifested in a fashion that I could recognize it. I can also look back and reflect on what I learned about it as well.

I know there will never be two experiences that look exactly alike, but when I think of love and my fondest experiences with the phenomenon, I know that it bears many of the same traits.

Thoughts? Comment below

Grenada Travel Series: Where I Stayed During My 7-Day Trip(Reviews Included)

The welcome rum punch I received on arrival to Laluna Resort in Mourne Rouge.

Hey Ya’ll!

I’m back from Grenada and finally have enough time to start diving into some of the details of my trip.

Before I even get into it, let me just say this: going back to Grenada for my 31st birthday was the most rewarding decision I made.

For seven days, I had another chance to explore the Spice Isle and really just build on my experience from the year before. My goal was to leave no stone unturned, but I’m reminded that there’s never enough to do it all.

That being said, one of things I was intentional about doing this time around was staying at a few different places. Not only did I want to diversify my experience, but I also wanted to make solid recommendations to any of my family, friends or followers, who may want to visit Grenada themselves.

That was a success!

I’m going to make one post that explores them all, but then you may see follow up posts, highlighting other things.

Here goes… :)

True Blue Bay Resort <3

TRUE Blue Bay Resort

I kicked off the first two nights at the True Blue Bay Resort.

There were a few things that stood out to me in my search and among them were the affordable suites, as well as their Diaspora Special.

With regard to the suites, they offer a wide range of room types from standard to caribbean chic, which is great for people, who appreciate options. I know I did.

To add, if you’re visiting the island to see family, they also have a special offer, which is referred to as the Diaspora Special. I felt this was such a thoughtful gesture, and since my blog is all about Diasporic travel, I definitely wanted to highlight this for my readers.

In terms of the property, the reviews were mixed, but I was pleased to get there and see, for myself, that this was indeed a lovely place to settle back into the island.

Picking the right property was one thing, but picking the right days to stay there was pure luck lol.

I had planned to stay there on Tuesday and Wednesday nights, but I had no clue that Wednesday night was the night to be on the resort. For context, Wednesday is the day of the week that everyone on the island goes to Dodgy Dock— the resort’s restaurant that’s situated on the water.

At Dodgy Dock you can find local food, live music, and…the party.

When I say I had a time? Y’all, it was a time. The singers that performed had range, the rum punch was rum punchin,’ the food was good and the energy was just great all around. I really enjoyed myself!

So ya’ll know, I booked a waterfront suite, which is a two-level apartment overlooking the water. The room was clean, the furniture was comfortable, it featured a balcony overlooking the water and there were absolutely no critters in my place. I’m going out of my way to say this, because I read reviews that had me a little worried, but I couldn’t relate and felt it was important to spell it out for anyone who may be concerned.

To add, the staff was so friendly and accommodating to me. They even went the extra mile and decorated my room for my birthday, leaving me a bottle of Cabernet for my enjoyment. I really felt the love!

NOTE: This is not a beach property, but they have a complimentary shuttle that will take you two and from Grand Anse Beach twice a day. :) Link HERE to book.

“Going back to Grenada was the most rewarding decision I made.”

Tarragon Apartments

On Thursday, I said my goodbyes to the hotel and staff at True Blue then headed over to my airbnb, which was located in the town of St. Georges(the capital).

There, I would find a modern and pristine airbnb at the Tarragon apartment complex.

Views from my balcony at the Tarragon apartments. I only spent $129/night here.

As a traveler, who sometimes wants to book an extended stay, I was both ecstatic and relieved that this one worked out. I booked from out of town, so didn’t have a whole lot of research to go on aside from the pics and the reviews.

It was very affordable with a great location, amazing views and pretty much on par with what I would expect to get from a long term apartment here in America. To add, since I was traveling solo, I also appreciated that it was very secure with key fob entry and a property manager that lived on site.

While I really didn’t use the facilities, the complex came with the basics, including a private pool. Additionally, every apartment boasted a balcony that overlooks Port Louis, the island’s award winning marina.

I didn’t spend much time there, but I made a habit of watching the sun rise and set from the comfort of my balcony. I can say with confidence that it’s missed. lol

The only caveat I would add about airbnb life abroad is that the social interaction is missing, so I had to be way more intentional about doing activities that fill in the gaps. I’ll include some of the things I did in my follow up! Link HERE to book.

LaluNA BOUTIQUE HOTEL AND RESORT

Sunday came before I knew it, and it was time for me to again check out and head to my third location. La Luna <3

After realizing how sweet the airbnb deal was, I contemplated canceling all other bookings, but the cancellation policies were not in favor of indecisive guests…so I kept them.

In the end, it was all in my best interest.

Laluna was always intended to be my treat yourself stay, and it turned out to be just that: a treat.

Me and Ms. Christine from Laluna! I met her the day I arrived, but this was taken as I was saying my goodbyes. When I told her I wanted a pic, she kindly told me not in her work clothes and proceeded to change for the photo! lol Energy!

For context, this was a beautiful, boutique hotel that boasts luxurious villas in Mourne Rouge, Grenada.

The property is nestled in a secluded area of Mourne Rouge Beach and it’s right on the Caribbean Sea, which is always my preference for beach days. This was also the first time, during my stay, that the beach was just steps away, so that was a plus.

Similarly to most caribbean hotels, when I arrived to the resort, they greeted me with a warm welcome and a glass of iced rum punch. This is my love language. lol

I stayed in the cottage suite, which came with a plunge pool, day-bed, walk-in closet and other amenities that all contributed value to my stay. I appreciated that it was colorful, well designed and so clean that I felt comfortable walking around on my bare feet(this is saying a lot lol).

Unrelated…the bartenders knew how to make proper cocktails and the food from the restaurant was flavorful, so it’s really giving 5 stars y’all.

While it’s marketed as a place for couples, honeymooners and the likes, I would recommend this resort to any solo traveler, looking for a unique and relaxed experience.

Most of my time was spent at the bar, meeting friends and socializing, but I took advantage of quiet moments to myself.

I’ll do a follow up post to share more details, but this was definitely worth my coins. I didn’t want to leave. Here’s the LINK to book.

“This is my love language.”

Enjoying a mango margarita prepared by @mixedbykimz at Royalton Grenada.

Royalton gRENADA

Bringing it all home, I spent the last two days of my trip at Royalton Grenada.
I actually stayed there last year, but since the world was still pretty much in disarray, the occupancy was much higher this time, making for a more lively experience. The price was higher too.

If you follow my blog page(@spottieottieblackgirl), you already saw this, but I was able to book this all-inclusive deal through Marriott Bonvoy, saving ~$600 total. It included a king size bed w/ balcony, unlimited food and drinks, two pools, non-motorized water sports and prime, beach real-estate on Magazine Beach. They also program for guests, so every night there’s something going on in the lobby, for you to enjoy entertainment.

I actually met two friends one night one. One of them was also celebrating her birthday, but both of whom were from the south(ATL and MEM). It was a match made! lol

Considering my week, I couldn’t imagine being anywhere else for my last two nights. I was really able to enjoy myself, because a lot of the fun was already curated.

I would definitely consider going this route if you’re visiting a country for the first time and/or if you’re traveling solo, because it just helps with your experience. Traveling solo is not always fun. In fact, sometimes it’s just as lonely as being anywhere else, so you need to have plan b. Just being real! Link to Marriott Bonvoy.

Conclusion

All in all, ain’t no complaints! I am totally pleased with the way each of these accommodations came together and appreciate the experience they provided me. If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to leave a comment!

Actually, leave a comment anyway. I want to hear from you!

Are You Considering Grenada?

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Sint Maarten: Things to Know Before You Go

This is where we are now. I wore a mask and a shield all while I was in the airport and aboard my flight. COVID life..

If you’re following my Instagram, then you know that I recently traveled to Sint Maarten for another birthday trip of a lifetime!

As with most things, I contemplated whether I would even take a birthday trip, but alas, I decided to stick to my tradition and man am I glad about it!

Once again, I pushed boundaries and quenched my thirst for travel, exploration and new experiences. There’s just nothing like it!

Anyway, I have already gotten some really great traction from my followers — two have already booked — and I’ve also gotten so many questions from those planning to go, so I wanted to make sure I got some quick details up for anyone looking to visit.

Here’s what you need to know:

You must submit an application to visit

Baybee, I was sick when I got to the airport and the desk attendant asked me to provide my application. What application?!

Due to COVID, Sint Maarten has established a mandatory health authorization for every visitor coming to the island that you absolutely must complete. If you do not complete it, you will not board a flight and your entry will be denied. They approve applications every 12 hours, but I recommend submitting it four days prior to your arrival for the best outcome.

They only have about 16 cases total, so they are doing all they can to protect their citizens as well as their guests. I have no choice but to stan.

Here’s a link to the application - gone and get your affairs in order. <3

A NEGATIVE COVID TEST IS REQUIRED

Yes, you must get have a negative COVID test. Not only that, but the test must also be taken within 5 days of your arrival date. If you take a test 6 days before and get a negative test, it will not meet the standard and you will be denied.

The COVID test is also a key component of the application, and your approval is contingent on the results as well as the time guidelines, so you’ll need to do this part first.

I was supposed to leave Wednesday, heading to Sint Maarteen, but because my test was out of date(7 days prior) and I didn’t have approval for entry, I actually ended up heading home. teardrop

Luckily, I was able to reschedule a flight the next day, get a rapid test in ATL and submit my application in time to get approved for the next flight out. Where there’s a will…there’s a way, and I made one!

Self Monitoring

One of the things I was worried about was whether or not I would be stuck quarantining at the house every day of my trip, since I’d heard that some countries were requiring that for traveling visitors. Luckily, that wasn’t the case, however, I did have to self-monitor.

Every day, I got an email to submit my temperature — in Celsius or Fahrenheit — to make sure my temperature was normal, and then I had to check the box vowing that I was telling the truth before sending. Very simple and it only took a few seconds. The data is pulled from the application, so the “day” will automatically populate to “day 1" or etc.

EXIT COVID TEST

The [seemingly] one measure that the United States has taken in response to COVID is the measure to have a negative COVID test before arriving back in the States. If you’re staying at a resort, I would just check to see if your resort is offering the option to take it there, as some of them do.

Otherwise, you can send an email to SLS to set up your test in time to get tested and receive results before your return flight home. Note: The link includes all the information you will need to confirm your appointment.

Please keep in mind that they are calling these “appointments",” but when you get there you pull a number and the first person who was there gets served first. If you want to be one of the first people, I recommend pulling up at 6:30 am and no later than 7 am. All appointments are between 7:30-8 am.

Additionally, they are closed on Saturday and Sunday, so do your due diligence and schedule far enough out to get a test in time not to get stuck.

Lastly, you will have to pay whether you have insurance or not. You have two options: 1) you can take the Antigen test for $65 or 2) you can take the PCR test for $75. I took the Antigen(rapid) test for $65 and got my results the same day. :)

You will find that most people on the island do not wear masks and will even tell you that you don’t have to worry about COVID out there — this is because the island has been so successful at keeping COVID at bay, but I would say proceed at your own caution.

I’d love to keep track of anyone visiting after seeing this post or any of my IG posts. If that’s you, can you send me an email or simply comment below letting me know if you’re planning to visit or have already booked a visit, as a result? I’d appreciate it! <3

More like this…

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Solo Dolo But Make it Travel

Where to start? I got so much positive feedback from my birthday trip to Antigua!

Not only did y’all encourage me for taking a leap, but many of you also expressed sentiments of taking your own solo trip.

It was already on my heart to share this perspective of my experience with you, so here goes. #dolo

Travel Agent, or nah?

I personally book and handle my own travel. I’ve planned enough trips to know how to go about this thing, and I like having the autonomy and flexibility to make any decisions on my own.

That said, there are some phenomenal services out there, and if this isn’t necessarily your forte and you have some extra dollars to allocate, feel free to do what’s best for you. The job of a travel agency is really to make the process less of a hassle for you. They can set up payment plans and leverage their relationships with properties to get you competitive packages, so there are some benefits to going this route.

Choosing a Destination

I’m obsessed with the African Diaspora and since my 25th birthday in Barbados, which was a huge learning experience, I have prioritized visiting the West Indies annually.

There are so many islands, and each time I learn of another, I add it to my mental list of places I might want to explore. From there, I do the math on what I can afford and make a decision.

That said, I always do a search on crime to understand the lay of the land, because even though I’m adventurous, I’m still very cautious.

Here are some places, including but not limited to the Caribbean, where I’ve visited and would feel comfortable traveling to alone:

• Providenciales, Turks and Caicos

• St. Johns, Antigua

• Fort de France, Martinique

• Christ Church, Barbados

• Paris, France

• Stockholm, Sweden

Airbnb or Resort

I’m a bargain shopper, so I look for the best accommodations at the most efficient rate. I also prioritize safety, so when booking Antigua, deciding between an Airbnb or Resort was a real conundrum for me.

I was tied between safety at the cost of a hefty expense or a nice, affordable stay with everything I needed, excluding formal security or local friends and family.

In the end, I went with the all-inclusive stay at a resort, and it was worth every penny.

Pros

• I didn’t worry about anything while I was there. My meals, drinks and on-site water sports were all covered all day every day.

• I met other people, who either stayed at the resort or worked on the property. This provided a social experience I couldn’t have traded for anything.

• I felt safe because security was present at the gate entrance/exit and on the property as well.

Cons

• Larger investment

If you’re visiting anywhere for the first time I’d recommend staying at a hotel or resort property.

At Shirley Heights- a stop on the Pink Panther island tour

Hobie Sail Boat

Hobby Sailing on the Atlantic

Catamaran Calypso Day Cruise

How to Prepare

Research

Learning as much as you can about the island before visiting is always a good idea. Some things you might want to find out before you visit are:

• What is the national currency and the exchange rate?

• Where’s the "city” and how close in proximity is it from where you’ll be?

• Is there a U.S. Embassy, in case something happens?

• What are the top things to do there?

• What’s the history of the island/country/people there?

• Is there a big night where everyone gets together and do something at a disclosed location?

Reviews

Read the reviews! This is your guiding light.

When I saw that one of the resorts I was considering had poor reviews for cleanliness, I moved on and didn’t look back.

Of course, people are fickle and may have an issue with things that may not bother you, but just prioritize your needs when you make a decision. The last thing you want to do is be uncomfortable on vacation.

Renting a car/Taking Taxis/Public Transportation

Depending on the infrastructure of the island, I prefer to rent a car.

In some places, like Antigua, it’s not the best idea, because the roads are really narrow and I didn’t see a whole lot of signage. However, in other places, like Martinique, where it’s basically like driving in America, it’s a plus, because you can avoid high fares and explore the island on your time, as you please.

The best is when countries, like Barbados, have functional bus systems that can pick you up at a stop near your stay and take you around the island for $1-$2 USD.

Lastly, but certainly not least, are the $1 cabs. These are run by locals who drive large vehicles around, pick up tourists for a low price and drop them off at stop along their route.

Activities

Activities are essential to a good trip!

It doesn’t matter where I go, I’m looking for the Black History Museums and the excursions. lol

1. Museums, because I want to understand my people’s contribution to society, celebrate it and add that to my repertoire.

2. Excursions because they are so much fun and provide an opportunity to meet other people and make friends.

That said, try to budget 1-2 excursions and 1 educational activity while you’re away. Here are some of my favorites:

• Tours that take you around the island

• Day Cruises to any wreckages, uninhabited islands, or etc.

• Land Sports on the property (at a minimum, I sprained my toe playing volleyball, but I made friends and had a lot of fun)

• Jet Skis

• ATVs

• Tubing

• Snorkeling

Highs and Lows of Being Solo

If you’re single, the real tea is that you solo travel every day. Seriously, all the things you do with and for yourself daily have prepared you to go off and enjoy this experience to the fullest.

Keeping that in mind, and even if you’re in a relationship, solo traveling comes with its own set of highs and lows. Here are some of mine.

Highs

• I did everything on my time. I got up at 6, I went to get breakfast, I spent hours on the beach… I ate when my stomach told me I was hungry and went back.

• There was absolutely no drama. None. Zilch. Zero. Nada.

• I had space to be free. I mean, the beauty of it all. I just remember floating in the water for hours not thinking about a damn thing, really.

• Taking my own pics was a high I didn’t anticipate and it’s also my new preference. I could see my poses, capture my own angles and fix my face in real-time. I also didn’t have to feel bad about asking for more pics because the first few someone was willing to take didn’t look good. Instead, I got back in front of the camera and took more. :)

Lows

• The first couple of nights, there were times at like dinner, when I would have appreciated having a friend to wind down with and talk to.

• I’m clumsy and injured myself several times while I was there. It was overwhelming at times, but thankfully there were people around me who offered a hand. <3

Travel Safely & Smart

I have found that traveling alone is comparable to relocating to a new city alone. The difference is, you’re in a different country-that however familiar, is still not your own-so you will want to take more precautions.

Here are some basic rules that I was more than willing to follow:

• Check in regularly to let your family know what you’re doing and ultimately that you’re okay

• If you make friends and feel safe enough to venture off, tell somebody where you’re going and who you’re going there with.

• Share your Room # and any other details about the property with your family so that they know other ways to get in touch with you should they have any problems reaching your line.

Note: Make sure you’re telling the people who actually care about you. My crew was solid.

Dad, making sure his baby girl remembered the lesson he taught me 10 years ago.

On the first night, I was sitting alone at dinner and as it dawned on me that I had come alone, a member of the staff brought me a bouquet of freshly picked flowers. I posted it to my story and my ma was like wayment. lol <3

Misc. Fees

Wifi

Whether it’s an Airbnb or resort, if you can find somewhere with wifi included, that will be the best way to go. This is an additive fee for a lot of resorts, but usually included at no additional cost when booking an Airbnb.

Data Plan

Regardless, I would set aside $10/day to go toward the international travel data plan fee that’s offered by your carrier so that you can make calls and use your phone as you please throughout the day(non-negotiable for me).

How it works is simple. Once you land, turnoff “airplane” mode and begin to respond to texts or access the internet, you’ll get a message that explains the fee and you’ll just have to reply “Y” to opt in. Please note: you’ll have to opt in each day you’re away.

Things You’ll Want to Keep Handy At All Times

• Passport/I.D.

• Pepperspray

• A book

• Cash and/or at least 1 debit/credit card

• Pain Medicine

• Feminine care items* (I also advise packing these- they are ridiculously expensive on the resort property)

• Portable charger

• Your phone

• Room key

• Cross body bag or back pack

I checked my purse for these items every single time I was about to leave my room.

Bon Voyage! (Have a great trip)

Hopefully, you’ve gotten a strong sense of how to go about planning your own trip and feel empowered to do so, if it’s on your check list.

I had no idea what to expect from Antigua, but every part of it was beautiful.

Can’t wait to hear about yours!

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Have More Questions? Leave a Comment and I’ll answer it there!

6 Times I Was Reminded I Wasn't Alone During My Solo Trip

When I first posted about my trip on Facebook, my dear prophyte said to me “girl, what did you do alone?”

It was a valid question.

In fact, I was asking myself the same question just a few days earlier, and I quickly got the answer: everything and nothing.

I did everything by myself, but rarely was I alone.

Here are six times that I was reminded I was in a good company throughout my trip:

1) As I’ve shared before, the first night was surreal. I had made it to the island, I was at the resort, and it was time to celebrate twenty-eight. The only issue was that I had never, in the history of birthday trips, done it this way before. How would I do it?

I sat there that night, trying to enjoy the entertainment, as a ton of thoughts raced through my mind. Somewhere between one thought and anther, a member of the Verandah staff was standing there with a bouquet of freshly picked flowers just for me.

It may seem small, but to me, it was a big gesture and I appreciated it. In that moment, I felt special, I felt seen, and I was reassured that everything would work out fine.

2) The morning after I arrived, I went to have breakfast in dining commons buffet. When I was done, I walked out to the main area of the resort, just as the info session was beginning. Although I had no idea it would be happening or thus any intention on going, I was right on time.

I sat down, eager to hear what excursions would be offered and shortly after doing so, a friendly face turned around and said to me, “Good morning!” It was this little lady, who was vacationing there from the UK with her equally friendly husband.

It turns out, they had seen me at dinner the night before at dinner. I’m grateful for this connection, because they one hello helped me to relax a little and open my mind to making new friends beyond those I may or may not have imagined. It just so happens that I saw them every morning at breakfast, and somehow we were always seated right next to each other.

3) Friday night I was at the bar taking shots with a family I had earlier played beer pong and volleyball with. After we took the shot, Paul, a police officer in Jersey City, says to me, “let me ask you something. Did you come all the way here by yourself?”

The rehearsed answer was of course “no,” but I said to him, yeah I did.

He goes, can I hug you? We hugged and in so many words he praised me for doing what he considered a “big” thing. I appreciated that moment.

Pigeon Point Beach

“Me saw er down dere strugglin” -Kamesha, speaking Dialect

4) As a stop on the Pink Panther Tour, we took a break at Pigeon Point Beach to swim for an hour. I spent 55 minutes floating in that beautiful clear blue water, but I wasn’t not going to take a pic while I was there.

I stepped out to take me a few selfies, but couldn’t hit them angles right without my stick. I heard a rustling in the bushes and looked up to see Kamesha. She saw me struggling trying to take my own pics, so she came over to help me. The photoshoot that ensued was pure heat. <3

5) Saturday Morning at Breakfast, I trickled in to see that I was right behind Joanne, Mary, and crew(his name escapes me). I’d met them a few days earlier over at the Rasta beach on the resort. We said hi and caught each other up on anything we’d done since our last time seeing each other, while we waited to be seated. Then, Joanne said, “well come have breakfast with us!”

I was used to eating alone so I was slightly hesitant and maybe also a little anxious to join people, but I was pleased to be invited. I took them up on the offer and we had a wonderful conversation.

6) Saturday night at the dock in St Johns. Since I spent most of my time in the countryside, my friend arranged to have me picked up so that I could experience what it was like to be in town.

When the night was over, I asked if I needed to find a cab to get back to the resort. He looked at me and said, “You think I’ma send for you and then make you take a cab back? What kind of man do you think I am?”

I— knew I was right about this. lol

All I can say is I’m incredibly grateful for every interaction. I know God used all of you to restore my faith in many things, and I pray he used me too. Until next time.

Appendix

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How I Spent my 28th Birthday in Antigua

Antigua treated me well

Celebrating my birthday is important to me. It’s another opportunity to reflect on where God has brought me and reset for wherever he intends to take me.

For that reason, I make it a point to celebrate with a birthday excursion in the Caribbean. In past years, I have traveled—with at least one other person—to Barbados, Turks and Caicos, and Martinique, but this year, I took myself to Antigua…alone!

There were lots of feels in the planning stage but in the end it came together seamlessly. Let’s get into the specs!

Flewed Out

I usually prefer to fly Delta, because…I trust the airline. It’s safe and they provide quality service, but as the saying goes, “if the dollas don’t make sense, fly Jet Blue” or whatever they said.

Most of the flights on all other airlines were $600-$700 and up for the dates I chose, but I toggled through the days on Google flights to see how prices fluctuated and found the winner for less than $330. It was a no brainer!

Of course, checked bags were an additional $70, so I made sure to pack smart and tight given I would not be paying an additional fee or wasting any monies. I loaded my shoes, fits, swimsuits, toiletries and everything into my roller bag and grabbed a beach bag to stuff my purse and any other small items to go under the seat. It worked out perfectly.

I boarded around noon, arriving in St. Johns Antigua at 5:30 PM. It was up from there.

6 Days 5 Nights in Paradise

tHE vERANDAh rESORT & Spa

I stayed at the Verandah Resort, and I had only just booked it a few days before my flight was scheduled to leave. I found it on Expedia, but when I realized I was being taxed all crazy, I headed over to the Elite Island Vacations site and booked it directly through them. I had some reservations about staying in the Willikies, because it’s the countryside of the island, but it was the best option for the experience I sought and it turned out to be exactly what I needed.

For starters, I had my own caribbean-style studio cottage on the property. It boasted a large bathroom, king sized bed, living room area(where I literally never spent time) and a balcony with a beautiful, tranquil view. It felt like a home away from home.

The best part? It was all inclusive. Here are my highlights:

• Water Sports - Kayaking, Hobby Sailing, windsurfing and etc. non motor sports were all included at no additional cost to guests staying at the resorts and yes, I did take advantage lol. This became my first time ever kayaking and hobby sailing, which were two of the most peaceful and scenic activities. I did both more than a few times throughout my time there.

• Food - As for food, there were four restaurants on the property and there was a different menu for each meal, so I had plenty of various, good eats during my stay.

• Drinks - Say it with me: “unlimited libations.” Rum Punch was my general go to, but I enjoyed a mimosa at breakfast and rose here and there as well.

• Friendly Staff - I loved loved loved the people at this resort, but also on this island. They were so friendly and welcoming to me which was more than I could ask for. Before leaving, as I was saying my emotional goodbyes, I was told “try to bring someone with you next time, but if you can’t, you have a family here” and I felt that. <3

• Beaches - The resort features two beaches, but I spent most of time at the main beach with the water sports crazy views of the Atlantic.

Shirley Heights

The view of the English Harbor from Shirley Heights.

Dow's Hill Interpretation Centre

Dow's Hill Interpretation Centre

Nelson's Dockyard

Pillars at Nelson's Dockyard

Nelson's Dockyard

Used to dock boats for cleaning. It took 3-4 months to clean but that was usually because the men were always drunk. lollll

My sis, Balentina!

Pink Fruit

Kamesha picked this piece of fruit from a cactus plant at Shirley Heights. Another person bit into it and it’s basically like kiwi on the inside. Very cool.

Shirley Heights

Nelson's Dockyard

Local Tours/Activities

Pink Panther Tours

First of all, the Pink Panther tour was everything.

It’s hosted by a group of female tour guides — my suhs — who take you around some or all of the most popular sites on the island.

They offer a half-day and full-day excursion, but I opted for the half, traveling to the four places listed below.

• Dow’s Hill Interpretation Centre - I love a good a history lesson, when I visit the Caribbean, and Antigua was no different. At Dow’s Hill there was a short multi-media presentation that talked about the colonization of Antigua(slavery) and ended with freedom, Antiguans embracing nature and celebrating life on the island.

• Shirley Heights

• Nelson’s Dockyard @ English Harbour

• Pigeon Point Beach - I enjoyed myself at this beach! It was an hour of clear blue waters and views of the hills and boats at the Harbour. I definitely got a couple of flicks!

I booked this tour through the resort, and the guy who runs the tour desk at the property, made it a point to pair me with Kamesha. In his words, he was going “to look out for me” and put me with the funnest of them all. He did just that. Of course, when it was all over, I had made friends with all of these ladies, talking about all things life, hobbies, family and so on. <3

All good vibes. Yeh mon.

Catamaran Calypso tour

This was boozy day cruise to some of the nearby uninhabited islands, which also offers a half and full day option. We took off from Long Bay Beach, which was only a few steps away from the Veranda, and were out on the water for about 4 hours, sailing to “Bird” and “Maiden” islands where you could swim, hike and collect seashells.

We also sailed past Oprah’s house in Jumby Bay, in case you care. lol

Devil’s bridge

Devils Bridge is one of Antigua’s national parks, and it was actually just a short walk from the resort. I injured my toes in route, so I wasn’t able to stay long but I was glad to check this off my list.

Aside from seeing the limestone formation with rushing waves crashing against it up close, I was particularly keen to learn about the myths associated with the site. It’s said that slaves would come here and jump off the bridge and into the Atlantic with hopes of swimming back home or jump to their deaths, choosing that over a life of bondage. #transatlanticslavetrade #AfricanDiaspora

“You have a family here.”

St. Johns

V. C. Bird Monument

I ventured off into town once or twice, and as I was walking down market street and soaking in the culture, I saw a huge monument of a Black man in the middle of the cross section. It was Sir Vere Cornwall Bird Sr.— Antigua’s first prime minister, national hero and the father of Antigua and Barbuda.

In the words of my friend, “he couldn’t even read but he led the people to freedom.” Just about all I needed to know.

Until Next Time

All in all, this was one of the best trips of my life! I had an amazing stay at The Verandah that came with a package complete with amenities, access to local tours, a great staff who became my framily!

Because there were so many layers to this trip, I’ll be writing about my experience in a series of posts, including one dedicated to solo traveling, to really share a full perspective. Antigua was everything.

Links

• The Verandah Resort & Spa

• Pink Panther

• Calypso Day Cruise

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A Weekend in the Windy City: Chicago

Waiting for the Brown line train to take us to Ravenwood for Lizzy J’s Cafe

I never really considered visiting the mid-west a sexy idea. I had heard great things about Chicago, and eventually wanted to visit, but aside from that, exploring this part of the country really hasn’t been a priority for me.

That said, I - to some degree - booked this 3-day trip on a whim, and I’m so glad I did. It was all good vibes.

Check out my top moments below!

Lizzy J Cafe

This gem of a restaurant is about 30 minutes outside of downtown in Ravenswood(still Chicago for those who don’t know…I didn’t). From the time my friend and I walked in we were all eyes and noses, because everything looked and smell good. I’ve included the menu, which doesn’t list everything, but we went with the Catfish and Crab Cake Benedict. I also had a side of potatoes, that were both picture and text worthy, but sadly I forgot to snap it. Whatever you do, make sure Lizzy J’s is part of your visit if you’re ever in the city. #BlackownedChicago

Dusable Museum of African American History

Black Americans have created so much beautiful history in these United States, and with each visit to a new major metropolitan city, I really make it my mission to learn more. That said, one google search led me to the Dusable Museum of African American History in Hyde Park, where I learned about the legacy of Dr. Margaret Burroughs, Black soldiers’ contributions to World War I, Chicago’s first Black mayor and so on and so forth. It was amazing.

Side note: Did you know there was an all-Black infantry of Illinois men who served in World War I? They were the only regiment in the entire United States Army composed of all Black officers. How was this left out of thee American World War I narrative?

Gold Coast/Lake Michigan

Funny story: I knew Chicago had a body of water nearby, and I thought it was Lake Michigan, but I didn’t want to sound silly asking to visit Lake Michigan from Illinois. So, I googled it and I was right. It’s Lake Michigan. LOL. It’s surrounded by Michigan, Wisconsin, Illinois, and Indiana, so...that’s the story. Anyway, we took what seemed like a long, arduous walk from the Sedgwick, brown line stop and the view was incredible.

P.S. It was biting cold.

Fellowship Chicago

Of all the things I did, visiting Fellowship Chicago Church was one of the most invigorating. Having not found a church home in Brooklyn, my home of almost 2 years, it has been extremely difficult to find a fairly youthful church where I feel fed spiritually. So, I stream Fellowship from my living room quarters, when I’m not hiking up to Harlem/FCBCNYC.

Sadly, I strolled in a little late - like 10 minutes - so I was kindly ushered downstairs to the overflow. I was SICK, and I slick wanted to walk around and see for myself if there was a lil spot for me in the sanctuary, but I didn’t. Though reluctant, I ate that “L” and happily obliged.

People must act up about this because not too far into the sermon, Pastor Reggie exclaims, “You ain’t got no seat,” and I felt that. Not for nothing, the overarching theme here was to treat everybody, regardless of status and etc., with dignity and respect. Full quote below.

“I been trying to free people! Fighting over seats…YOU AIN’T GOT NO SEAT….Everybody is equal when you get to the cross.”

In the end, it all worked out because the church was celebrating Black History Month, and had food ready after service…downstairs…right next to where the overflow sat. Guess who was 3rd in line to get a plate. :)

All jokes aside, I feel blessed to have been there to receive this message live. Listen to the full sermon here.

The Original Garrett’s Popcorn

I couldn’t visit Chicago and not stop by the original Garrett’s Popcorn. My parents put me on years ago when they brought a cheddar and caramel glazed mix - popped to perfection - home after their own trip to Chicago for the first time. Over the years, I would come to know this as the “Garrett Mix” which we would have shipped to us here and there. That said, this was the icing on my cake.

All in all Chicago was a good time! For a quick trip, I was able to pack a lot in, familiarizing myself with Chicago’s Black roots, great restaurants and good friends. It surely hasn’t seen the last of me.

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Puerto Rico with the Girls

This is a reflection on a girls’ trip we took to San Juan, Puerto Rico in January, when the world was normal and an apocalypse was just something from a sci-fi movie.

We celebrated three birthdays that weekend and it was such a good time. To the memories…

Mofongo >

Old San Juan

Cobble Stone Streets

Stop (yes, I learned Spanish. lol)

San Sebastian Street

Colorful Homes

“ouu, let’s do a formation pic”

“aye, catch dis wave right quick”

“because what’s a ‘girls’ trip’ without laughter?”

“did someone say margaritas? we’ll take three, please!”

“girl trips are just good for the soul.”

“until next time..”

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Twenty-Six in Turks and Caicos

"I-AIN-GA-LIE..."

-Me, getting ready to explain how lit this trip was.

*view from Ocean Club Resort East

Now that the dust has settled, my 26th Birthday was filled with adventure, laughs, love and a ton of fun.  

I visited the beautiful island of Turks and Caicos with my best friend, and it’s safe to safe we had the time of our lives. 

Here’s a quick rundown of our trip.

For starters, we stayed in a cozy two bed/two bath condo called Josy Villa in Grace Bay. It was nice, CLEAN, beautifully decorated, equipped with necessities, inclusive of a pool and one of the most affordable places we could find to suit the two of us(read: our budgets lol).

On top of that, it was located within a 5-10 minute radius from everything, including Grace Bay beach, which we later learned was named the number one beach in the world! 

The first night started slow, which was sort of the expectation. Some of my older counterparts, who had previously visited the island told me it was a place to get away, relax and chill. Not much going on in terms of "fun."

And maybe that was their experience, but there was much more in store for us. lol

Allow me to paint another picture for you, if I may.  

Once we made it to the condo, unpacked and got situated, we dressed for dinner and made our way to Danny Buoys. It’s a popular bar on the Grace Bay stretch and one of the most happening places for entertainment. The food was okay, but the hospitality was unmatched!

One second Lex and I were eating; catching up on a quiet night and the next second we had rounds and rounds of shots coming to our table, as we bopped to Aidonia. It was an unreal turn up and a perfect way to bring in my 26th!

So, that was Wednesday, night number one, and it set the tone for the rest of the week and what ultimately would become one of the best of my life...honestly truly.

Posing at Danny Buoys! We just couldn't get enough of that place!

Thursday, March 8th, was queen day, and it felt like it! We spent the morning relaxing on the beach at Ocean Club Resort East, eating good food, soaking up sun, and to be honest, getting our sleep on. That first night took us out, so the recovery period was necessary. 

But it was still my birthday, and the celebration was sure to continue that evening. 

Luckily, we didn't have to go looking for the "fun," because in Provo, Thursday nights are for Fish Fry!

For this weekly event, Turks Islanders set up tents at Kids Park Beach and sell the real deal authentic Caribbean food, frozen treats, souvenirs, libations and just about everything that's anything on the island. 

We definitely caught a vibe(see below)

Me and my bestie at Fish Fry! #TurksIslanderTings

"After the party is the after party"

From Fish Fry we headed back to Danny Buoys for the after party. It was karaoke night, but neither of us performed. We did partake in a little dancing though. Because, Cupid Shuffle. Duh. 

After Danny Buoys we went to Blue. From Blue, we went to Sandbar, and finally, to Versace. The night went up!

Please note: *no [decent] pics were taken* lol

Beatrice from Seven Stars! Lex and I stopped by the luxury resort Friday morning for breakfast and got nothing but good vibes. She tried her best to persuade us to stay there on our next visit, but per our status that is broke and bougie, it's not looking so hot. lol We'll be visiting her again..for breakfast! <3

We spent Friday Morning at Seven Stars, having a most delightful breakfast. For me that meant pancakes and berries covered with syrup and a mimosa to complement it. 

I thought that would be all, but one of the servers knew it was my birthday, and surprised me with a plate full of fruit with "Happy Birthday" written in chocolate syrup.

It was such a thoughtful gesture, and I was overwhelmed with joy and gratitude.

Catching some waves in the Atlantic on Grace Bay Beach at Seven Stars Resort. Their beach property is private, but it turns out they will cover the cost, for non guests to come enjoy. Just check-in with the guys at the pool desk. You don't want no problems, trust me. lol

By Saturday our trip was coming to a close, but it sure didn't feel like it.

We were still on a high! 

As with every other day, we began with a beach breakfast at Hemingway's, making our way over to the other side of the island for Sapodilla Bay shortly after finishing.

We met the owner of Rent-A-Ski, who rents Jet Skis and other water vehicles out there. Since jet skiing, along with tubing and the calm, Caribbean sea, was on our to-do list, we figured we'd do it all at once.

Jet skis and snap shot courtesy of Rent-A-Ski! Make sure you hit them up if you go!

The bay was nothing but views. Million. dollar. views. Mansions and Malibus.

Just kidding, no Malibus. But definitely mansions. 

The sea was my favorite part, though. Instead of rushing waves rolling in from the Atlantic, it was just calm, clear, blue water; a perfect bed to just lay, or float rather, and relax.

And relax we did...til about 4pm.

We spent the rest of the evening enjoying happy hour at Pelican Bay with some of our new, favorite friends, enjoyed a well-prepared dinner at Coco Bistro(a restaurant you MUST dine at), and party hopped all night. It was truly a good time!

Turks, thank you for the most amazing experience.

I'll be back! <3 

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